An excerpt from Mooney's novel 'Hometown Heroes', followed by lyrics from the albums 'Perrier St', 'Ghosts of Music, Past', and the 'davysound tapes':

From Hometown Heroes:

Chapter 18:
Joe Applebalm

So let us not forget those down in the trenches, keeping the music alive and keeping it very real.
People of America!
Your culture is not negotiated in boardrooms or posted on social networks. It is painfully sweated out in bars and saloons, and on street corners. It is mumbled drunkenly into the humid wasteland at Bywater intersections at 3am. It is not ready for primetime, and is not being neatly packaged for your consumption. But it is very important to your humanity, for whatever that is worth these days.

The ending of ‘Hometown Heroes’

Joe Applebalm started the morning with two large, steaming cups of espresso in order to muster up the required momentum to shovel his car out of a snow bank with a plastic dustpan. It was hard work, and he sweated in the frigid air, often stepping into the frozen muck up to his knees, wetting his socks. He cursed the pitiless city:
“Hot as hell in the summer, and then this? I should have stayed in New Orleans with the witches!"
He finally pried the car door open. Ensconced in the driver’s seat, he turned the key. The engine groaned into an idle. He sat still, exhausted, and waited for the heat from the defroster to melt the snow on his back window. He flipped the steering wheel’s robot arm down two notches, trying to activate the windshield wipers and clear last night’s drift from the windscreen, but nothing happened, only a soft mechanical buzzing. Joe suspected the mechanism wasn’t trying very hard. He pushed the button on the end of the plastic protrusion, but the strange blue fluid that on normal mornings shot out from under the hood onto the glass with a medium-pitched whir—the fluid that never actually removed bird shit or anything more tenacious than a smudge of freshly spattered muck from the sidewalk—it too was taking the morning off, probably frozen into extremely clean ice cubes. The radio had been left on from the night before, when he’d arrived back in Astoria in the wee hours of the morning after spending several frustrating hours networking at jazz clubs in the West Village. It was blaring WNYC, but the broadcast was the music program ‘Feedback’, a show he loathed. It always brought to mind the famous Frank Zappa quote, that rock journalism was ‘people who can’t write, interviewing people who can’t talk, for people who can’t read.’ Joe sighed and turned off the radio.
Frozen silence.
He was feeling nauseous, and the thought of the fourteen half-hour guitar lessons he was heading to Long Island to teach that day was weighing heavily upon him, like a murder upon a conscience.
He abandoned the futile attempt at melting the snow from the rear window with the heat from the weak vents on the dashboard, opting instead to manually wipe away the frost from the side mirror with a dirty Dunkin’ Donuts napkin. It revealed the frozen street behind. The emptiness appeared closer than it actually was. Joe pondered how far he would make it down Astoria Boulevard before a cop pulled him over for having a snow-covered, fully obscured back window.
“Fuck it, if they pull me over the Louisiana License plate will do me in before they even get to the snow regulations," he muttered to the indifferent, white wasteland.
New York was a city of laws, laws that were impossible to follow. In New Orleans such regulations were few and seldom enforced. Even murderers were casually pardoned by the dysfunctional justice system. New York had a different view of the proper functioning of society. It was a social Darwinist model: combine a crumbling infrastructure, exorbitant rents, broker fees, no dancing in bars, no smoking in bars, no drinking on the streets, no grass, few trees; add eight million people and watch them fight the system for dear life each train-waiting day and bedbug-bitten night. Everywhere Joe felt the rabidity and striving misery of the population. And it was all by choice; he seldom encountered a native New Yorker. Everyone had emigrated from somewhere else to subject himself willingly to the slow torture.
“And let’s not forget," Joe muttered in conclusion, “all this and then you have to move your car four times a week so the occupying force’s tank-like cleaning vehicles can blow the trash from the streets onto the sidewalks. Later you walk through it on the way to your 45-minute subway commute.
“Before at least I could walk to Bravo," he continued, changing the subject, “although the job was suicidally tedious. Now I’m teaching these little bastard rich kids. At least they keep it interesting with their budding antisocial, immoral behavior. God, I never practiced either, but at least I had the decency to feel bad about it!"
The trek down the Grand Central Parkway was murderous, of course. More municipal vehicles that looked like military surplus, going 35 on the highway, spraying rock salt onto the roads to melt the snow. On this fine morning he gave himself an hour and a half to make it out to Hempstead, and it looked as though he would need every minute. Back on WNYC ‘Feedback’ had ended, followed by ‘To The Point’. Warren Olney was doing a show about Katrina, talking to the former mayor:
“…we did the best we could, Warren, under trying circumstances…"
“Amen, to that, brother Ray," Joe replied, passing a minivan on the right near the I-678 split, “we’re all doing the best we can, under trying circumstances."
The Cross-Island Parkway was a little better, and then the Southern State was an easy drive, so he made it to the music store with 30 minutes to spare.
Then there was nothing to do but have that third cup of coffee.
The lessons were spread out over the course of the day: from 10:30 in the morning until 12pm, then an hour break; 1pm to 2, followed by an hour and a half break; then 3:30 to 8, straight through. Planning out the coffee schedule was a constant preoccupation for Joe. He had discovered through trial and error that the best strategy was to have his two cups in the morning before the drive over, then power through to the 2pm break. This prevented the inevitable caffeine crash brought on by more than three cups before noon. Then at 3:20 he could get a large one from the bodega on the corner: a weak, watery, creamy, sugary mixture (that would probably work well removing the frost from the car’s back window). It usually got him through that last, brutal 9-lesson stretch without yawning like a fool every 5 minutes.
But this fine, snowy, sunless day he’d compulsively had the third cup at 10am. By 1:40 he felt the crash coming, in the middle of his 5th lesson. He was trying show an 8-year-old kid how to play ‘Hotel California’ in the key of Am, and the little bastard hadn’t clipped his left hand fingernails, wouldn’t stretch his ring finger far enough to get the C chord to come out right, and had been complaining that the guitar somehow hurt his leg. Joe felt the fatigue flowing from his brain down the spinal chord, like tepid bathwater down the drain, permeating his entire being.
He finished the lesson somehow, and was rewarded with a merciful one-hour break, the better to nurse his fatigue with more caffeine. Now, at 2:45pm, he was on cup number 4. He was reclining on a couch in the lobby of the small music school waiting for his 3:30 student, trying not to brood over the 9-lesson prison sentence that ended his day.
The always-difficult hour of 3pm was again nearly upon Joe Applebalm, guitar instructor...

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Lyrics from the 2017 album "Hope of Home:"

Cold, Sober

Wait, don’t tell me—
Who will help me through this time?
Mess is mine, game is time.

And you can bend it backwards
Or fold it over.
Space is green, I made the scene.
What you mean—

I thought it over.
I’ve gone cold sober,
And it ain’t helping me.

Scan the background,
Watch the takedown—wild the world.
Find the girl, make her yours.

Then the ending:
Neverending bored afraid.
Never made.
Show your grade:

The game is over.
I’ve gone cold sober,
And it ain’t helping me.

Shrinking older,
Never bolder,
You my friend, until the end,
Round the bend.

Dream absconder?
My words you’ll ponder by and by,
Until the sky.
Heave that sigh

And pass it over.
I’ve gone cold sober,
And it ain’t helping me.

Stutter Step

Walking is harder than it seems:
You put your foot the wrong place
And there go all your dreams.

These days I walk alone it’s true.
Still I remember the walks I took with you.

“Look around you," they said, “Love will down you."
But instead I close my eyes and hope the path is clear.

And so I stumble,
But what would you have done?
You put your foot the right place and then you’ve won.

These days I tend to bob and weave,
Stutter stepping right through the autumn leaves.

Sidewalk strutting isn’t good for nothing,
Listen to me:
When in doubt you better just sit still.

Like Before

This night is all I can give you.
These few hours please try to be true.

Moon above us, like before.
Those days love cost me much more.

Soon these magic hours wane,
So kiss me with tenderness and don’t explain.

Lyrics from the 2012 album "Perrier St:"

Perrier St

Old days
Cold days
New ways to cry, only just begun.

Old days, cold days,
We’re far from.

Some things
Faded but still you come haunting sleep.

Closer, closer,
Soft you creep.

Some things
Jaded it’s true, heal me heavy sleep

Closer, closer,
Soft you creep

First World Death March

Bombs away again,
Bad guys pay and then
We’re okay my friend,
Even so…

TV buys it,
I try to hide it so
I can sleep again.

Payloads are busted,
Can we be trusted
When as the righteous men we choose the bloody way?

World’s worth the fighting…
Casualty sighting?
Must be a slow day.

We keep biting it,
No use fighting it,
Dig a tunnel help you no one will,
But one day you can march too.

Miles Between

Drifting on a sea of anger,
Senseless ships that bob in waves.

Everyone I know
Plays a different game,
But ‘rules are rules’ they say.

Bridge is blown, a chasm’s opened.
Lurking who knows what we’ll find?

Time it was, I dreamed their dreams:
A world of gloom aglow.
That world is old, and lies were told,
Now dream futures are bought and sold.

All of Her

Welcome home,
How you’ve grown!
Your face changed,
Voice is strange,
I remember, I remember…

You weren’t like the others were,
Your smile made those years a blur.
I’m forgetting, I’m forgetting
All of her.

Welcome home,
Years have shown.
Words they fail,
Dreams derail.
All confusion, all confusion…

Stay there, where you’ll always be
Let down or just lost at sea.
I’ll remember what was rendered
All by me.

All of her.


Now be still,
Now be angry.
Loss of will?
You should thank me.

You’re my thrill,
You I envy.
You content me.

Now be still,
You’re my thrill,
Now be angry.
You I envy.
Loss of will?
You should thank me.
You content me.

Gone beyond,
Ever after.
Tired song,
Careless laughter.


Out of the darkness, she
Runs to the things she knows.
Colors bright and shadows.

All of the world pines,
Can’t she be mine, mine remain?
All of the world a crimson stain.

Out of the darkness, she:
Scarlet and green for spring,
World is everlasting.

All of the wolves pine,
Can’t she be mine; mine remain?
All of the world a crimson stain.


Victory is ours, for now,
But careful at night:
Things that feel right seem wrong.

Sunken love beneath the sea,
Don’t rise, who will rescue me?

Get thee to a nunnery.

Once Was True

Angel eyes in haunted skies
Will gaze no more aground,
Upon the green, the setting scene,
A world so tightly wound.

Cross your heart and say a prayer,
As though there’s someone there.

All the voices in the sky are pleading.
It’s the end of all that once held meaning for you,
I mean all that you once felt was true.

Last Days

She said what she had to say,
Things that she did not feel:
‘Tomorrow I’ll be gone,
Yesterday wasn’t quite real.’

The last days I remember:
Green! Everything splendor.
You will always be there,
Blooming and fair,
Never to fade.

From the 2009 Album 'Ghosts of Music, Past':

There and Back Again

I packed my bags and ashtray,
Headed for the road.
Two for two and rid of you,
I think it’s time to go.

Summer’s coming early,
I can feel it in the skies:
They’re pale and blue and so are you,
I think it’s time to fly.

We will find you, where you going?
We’re the fears that you’re unknowing heart
Is always following behind.

Air is heavy, sun is blinding,
World is weighing, now my pining
Heart has got to make it out alive.

Lost in lengthened shadows,
But there’s nowhere to hide.
On the run from everyone
But there’s no peace inside.

Some are coming early,
Some are coming late,
As for me, I’m going free
Won’t tempt the hands of fate.

I need no one, no one needs me,
Nice to know you, please God, speed me.
I’ve outgrown this coffin of a town

At least for now, I’ll see you later,
Ask for my head on a plate, you’ll
See me smiling, don’t expect a frown.

Traveling so lightly,
Everybody’s like me.
We’re all here to tell them that the world is ours.

Station to station, like stop-motion animation,
Tomorrow I will wake up and the old world will renew my powers.

Packed my bags with ashes,
Headed for the road.
The sun is high and so am I,
I think it’s time to go.

It’s summer in the jungle
Of merry weather lies.
We’re rolling round and getting down
Like pigs up in their sties.

We will find you where you’re going,
We’re the fears that you’re unknowing heart
Is always following behind.

Air is heavy, sun is blinding,
World is weighing, now my pining
Heart has got to make it out alive.

My heart is gonna make it out alive.

The Captain's Daughter

Looking out over the water,
The husband of the captain’s daughter,
I’ve been trying to get it right:
The dying of the harbor light.

Silver seagulls singing out,
I can’t believe I ever doubted.
My old friend, why so blue?

Did the ocean get to you?

Did the hours of pacing while your memory’s erasing me
Make you wonder why you spent these days of sea and sky?

I’m asking for the hand of Esmerelda,
She knows things that she won’t tell you,
This time I’ve just got to know,
Where I stay after you go.

They all turned me out of doors,
I crashed a while upon the floors
Of lonely, lucky, boys and men,
And girls who tell me I’m their friend.

Yeah, the hours of pacing
And the phony self-effacing
And the tears so out of place in these three rooms I call my own

Have made me yours.

Now I go to port on Sunday
To feel the ocean breeze upon me,
I see your ship cutting through
The harbor waves, the day is new.

Out at sea the evening lingers,
Morning tries to spread his fingers,
Spread yours too and grasp the oar,
There’s a man gone overboard.

But even when I’m drowning
I don’t spend too much time frowning,
When the vessel runs aground we’ll both start over again.

The Noisy People

All along the icicle island,
Screams from a nightingale sometimes frightening,
So long ocean town,

I got off one morning on Tuesday,
My lucky news day, all of the soothsaying wonders
Sold out each other.

You get lost, and I sit singing,
Bring the frost and I’ll go springing,
Count the cost our telephones ringing,
I’ve never been one for all the noisy people.

Strange memories one icicle morning,
Of carnival courting,
I’ve been reborn into,
So long ocean scene,

We got off that very next Tuesday,
You were the news they brought me and who says they
Taught me or caught me a-walk in my sleep.

You get lost, and I’m still singing,
Dancing round the square I’m spinning,
Up and down this lovely feeling.
I’ve never been one for all the noisy people.

Now in the grey light I see what I’m after,
Sinister laughter, they know I’m captured,
So long ocean scene.

Waves in the night came and asked for my baby,
They hoped to save me, some more than maybe,
Hello yesterday’s dream.

On and on the winds keep blowing,
Sea and spray, your eyes are glowing,
Weep not for those gone before me.
Fear no nightly noises from the noisy people.


Waking from my slumber,
The sun’s already high.
Begs a deeper question,
Answers by and by.

Days spread out before me
Like blankets on the ground.
Begs a deeper question,
Wants a louder sound.

Songs of love and rainy days,
Or songs of fields of sugar cane,
By now thought I’d have more to say,
But who knows why I strayed?

This is what they would have promised
If they’d promised anything at all,
Never wait, who knows how long it takes
‘Til words will fail us all.

I’m trying.

Things we took for granted,
Stolen melodies,
Grown up sick and pampered,
A diagnosed disease.

You’re spread out before me,
Glimmer in your eye.
Begs a deeper question,
Wants more than a sigh.

Over and over and over….

I’m trying so hard.
I’m trying a little too hard.

Wakened from their cancer,
Stolen melodies,
Grown ups sick and pampered
Diagnose disease.

Years spread out before me,
Angels frown and fret,
Wake me from my slumber,
But don’t let me forget the dream.

Trapped inside this prison flesh,
My body’s mine, I know it best.
From you there’re still some things I’d wrest
To end this quest you know

I’m trying so hard.
I’m trying a little too hard.
For you….

Only Summer

You set out one August day,
Said that you would see me when
The summer came again this time to stay.

It was clear and lonely then,
Set the watch to count the seasons.
Winter, spring, and fall, whatever happened to them all?

Please beware of falling leaves,
Like someone else’s memories,
They’re not for you, they’re not for me,
Only summer.

Light a candle, waste away,
Fill the glass ‘til break of day.
I’ll be with you soon to say
It’s summer.

Only summer.

There across the ocean wide,
Or lying by another’s side,
Thought I caught you laughing while I cried.

Cruel the dreams that plague the sleep,
Dark and fathomless the deep,
Painful slow the seasons creep ‘til summer.

Feverish, afraid to yield,
I called you to my battlefield,
You gave me words,
I need the fields of summer.

Hair of raven, skin of snow,
Naked in the fireglow,
With dreams of you to death I go,
Or to summer.

Only summer

Pay heed to what I say to you my January child:
Get thee to a place where we’ll no longer be denied.

Love is young, but getting older,
Look outside the window
Where the breeze is blowing colder.

All the songs I sing are but a cry to you,
Sad and True.
Help me change my tune, for others
Must be getting bored and soon

No one will be listening,
I release the spell they’re under.
Look outside the window
Where the eyes are full of full of wonder.

Summer Shower Song

Rain, rain, go away,
City park is drowning.
Find the words to make her stay,
My love is frowning.
Climbing through another day,
In my new surroundings.

This old town is sleeping still,
It may sleep forever.
Raindrops on my windowsill,
They may fall forever.
Find the words to mend the ill,
Get me through the weather.

This time next year, I won’t be here,
You’ll be waiting on the other side of the world.

Who’ll remember, come September,
Faded splendor, beautiful girls?

Rain, rain, you’re still here?
Got something to tell me?
Now I’ve been around the world,
You I can’t dispel.
The ordinary people seem to do quite well,

Believe me, I’ve seen
Seems like millions,
Right here and on the other side of the world.

Waking, dreaming,
Smoking, steaming,
Loving, leaving
Beautiful girls.

Sunshine every day,
Rainstorms every hour,
Through the laughing fields we play:
Water for the flowers.

Find the words to make the memories real
And climb the ivory towers.

Over the Ocean

Two o’clock in the morning,
I’ll go to sleep here,
Evening’s been pretty boring,
But good for this time of year.

I’ve been thinking of you
But you’re not coming through.
Over the ocean

Two o’clock in the morning’s
Become seven o’clock in the evening,
Half of the world it’s pouring,
Half of the world is sleeping.

I’ve been thinking of you,
But I’m not sure who’s dreaming who
Over the ocean

All alone on the promontory,
Got some new words, yeah,
I’ve learned a new story:
Over the Ocean

You and I, I can’t remember
When here it’s July and there it’s December
Over the ocean

At risk of repeating me sailing across the sea
Tell me your name one more time.
I’m in the mood you see, of insecurity,
And I’ve only got one more dime.

But I can’t imagine any better time

We’d be the special ones,
Either side of the suns,
Or any constellation.
We’ll build a bridge across,
Over the southern cross,
To any destination,

All that we need is just a little patience.

Big Time

Big time, stay away from me.
Big time, all that you want me to be.

Lonely faces meet across the room,
Social graces, soon they seal your doom.

Big time, get out of my way,
Big time, I don’t have that much to say.

Only moonlight makes me feel at home.
In your spotlight I’ve got nowhere to roam,

In my little room there’s always wonder passing under,
Running over like a stream.
Outside the electric world, beeps and buzzes, frets and cusses,
Won’t let it wake me from my dream,

I hear the cell phones ringing,
To which girl art thou flowers bringing?

Big time, you’ve got a lot nerve,
Big time, to come up in my world.

All the blonde girls, sleeping still tonight.
They’ve got big boys to make them feel alright.

Here in my cocoon, I’m underwater, can’t be bothered,
By the surface waves, or ships with oars and slaves,
Mermaids all around me now, they tell me stories of days before me.
It’s quiet now except my singing.

I hear the cell phones ringing,
To which girl art thou flowers bringing?

Big time, why won’t you leave me be,
Big time, I have to pay, is that the key?

Take my music, here take my guitar,
Go with God and all the other stars.

I hear the cell phones ringing,
To which girl art thou flowers bringing?


I’m going to Cleveland,
I’m stowing away.
Leave this town in all of its glory,
Plenty of others will stay.

I’ll find me a boxcar,
I’m leaving tomorrow.
Going where no one will find me,
Fill all their hearts with sorrow.

So much fun again, on the run again,
Sleeping under a Midwest sky.
See the corn and the burdens borne
And the factory smoke in your eye.

Stop off in Milwaukee,
Walk around with my eyes closed.
Find a bar by smell of the barley,
Plenty of alleys to doze.

Get back to your boxcar!
Your leaving tomorrow,
Going where nobody knows you,
No one will ever feel sorrow.

Keep your eye on the muddy sky,
There’s a storm that’s brewing and blooming low.
Pull my coat around, flowers all around,
Looks like we’re in for snow.

I’m going to Cleveland,
I’m stowing away.
Leave this town in all of its glory,
Plenty of others will stay.

Maybe Tomorrow

“Sorry" has a welcome ring,
Now that I’m alone.
In my car I’m a great big star
And yes, I’ll drive you home.

The past glides by as hubcaps shimmer,
Ahead the open road.
I’ll sing a verse for all it’s been worth
As sun reflects on chrome.

I won’t last forever.
And neither did you and I,
Despite all the tears we cried.

The road goes on, it’s better.
And maybe tomorrow….

True, this life’s been good to me,
You know I can’t complain.
But you bit me hard and you left me scarred,
Kissed me quite insane.

The dashboard light is shining brighter
Than the stars above.
The memories sail by like trees while
Children play and fall in

Love won’t last forever.
It came, it saw, it fled.
It stung us and now it’s dead.

The road goes on, it’s better.
And maybe tomorrow….

This night is like a memory
Approaching us unseen,
But how can I forget the things we said
But didn’t mean?

I dream the same dream every night:
The moon is full, your eyes are wide,
I fear I’m moving on, don’t wait up for me.

‘Cause I won’t last forever.
I said it a thousand times,
I meant it and now it rhymes.

The road goes on, it’s better.
And maybe tomorrow…
Baby, tomorrow….

The Last Goodbye

This is the last goodbye to one I loved.
Spirit away all the toil and the trouble,
Things remind me of.

Clock on the wall and the ring of the phone,
Song that I sing as I sit here alone,
All that I wanted and all that I own
Reminds me of you.

Calling to me from across the years,
A voice young and old
Tells me of fear and of sorrow and pain that’s never outgrown.

Nights I spend walking in search of your smile,
The wounded all gather and feast for a while
On the empty desire that keeps them in style,
Reminds me of you.

Years I hid inside your arms,
Where do I go now?
Lost amidst the quiet streets of this ancient, empty town.

Years we bid our meager charms on future lullabies.
We’ll catch up some other place, some other time.

Clock on the wall and the ring of the phone,
Song that I sing as I sit here alone.
All that I wanted and all that I own
Reminds me of you.

Lisa, Darling

Lisa, darling,
You’ve done very well,
Checkpoint Charlie
Let you through the swell.

I don’t know what all this means,
But you confuse me so:
Thoughts and words are garbled dreams
Like memories of snow.

All the girls I watch go by are melting into you

Lisa, Darling, if you only knew.

Lisa, Darling,
My shelter from the storm.
Now I watch while
Raging waters foam.

Clouds are grey and gathering
To send me on my way.
Fallen like the mercury
To wind and rain I pray

For the girl who stole my heart then lost it in the fray,
And Lisa, darling was spirited

I’m speaking clearly can’t you hear me
Calling through the years.
Through nights of fear, you’re nowhere near
To water me with tears.

Thought I’d be the one to let you down
Into the ground.

Lisa, Darling
My shelter from the storm.
Checkpoint Charlie’s
Raging waters foam.

Clouds are grey and gathering,
But you confuse me so,
I’ve fallen like the mercury
To wind and rain and snow.

All the girls I watched go by have melted into you.
Lisa, Darling, why can’t you be true?


Hello, goodbye Joanna,
Won’t see you past tonight.
The road for me is moving on
And our time has died.

But I’ll think of you when I’m alone
Sifting through my dreams.
Don’t leave a light on,
Always wonder what that means.

So many happy endings,
Tell me which one should I choose?
Every one around me is
Cashing in their dues

On a ticket out of indecision
Into somewhere more serene.
My train is leaving too,
I’ll see you in my dreams.

Joanna I never knew you,
But lord knows I tried to
Be a friend to every end and mean.

Tonight it’s too late,
The moment’s passed us by.
Maybe tomorrow we’ll mend it.

Yesterday’s always changing
And tomorrow is today.
The road goes ever on and on
But our tracks are soon erased.

So much for us Joanna,
Too late to set things right.
Another time, another place we’ll mend it.

But sometimes it’s too late to mend it.

Moon's Mood

Your smile is inside me,
Your body beside.
Your faces like phases change,
Change by moonlight.

And here we are,
The lighted streets, the coffee bars:
Our home on the range.

Hello high tide,
Goodbye Porkpie.
Not so distant now,
You’re not so easily disallowed.

Not so simple now.

How wide the ocean!
I guess that’s deep devotion.
Wipe all your cares away,
Hit the potion.

Same old moonshine:
This band, this time,
And I’ll be on my way.

Düsseldorf dreaming,
Angel of demon?
Not so certain now.
This act is over, take a bow.

You were the only
One who could show me
How really real I am
When I’m lonely.

Day after day,
True love, to blave,
Giving ourselves away.

Sleep and be patient
For a smile not so vacant.
And when it comes you’ll know
How far you have to go.

Farther than you’ll ever know.

Father that you’ll never know?

Christmas in November

Christmas time came early this year,
I was softly singing
Songs until the memories appeared,

But I almost let you go this year.

Winter on our minds became the mist on bedroom windows.
Condensation what we left behind.

But I almost let you go this year.

It’s pointless now to fear
Memories blown through autumn streets
By winds of time so subtle sweet.

I almost let you go this year.

Lyrics to "In This Balance of Tunes:"

What You Got

Everyone sees you there,
More than the best can bear,
Everyone wants what you got baby.

Don't let them pass you by,
Give us an unaffected sigh,
Everyone knows that you say maybe.

We've all been there before:
Battles won in the endless war,
Holding the line what else can soldiers do?

It's all above the board,
You just do what you can afford,
Everyone wants what you got baby.

Or take it another way,
No one hears what you have to say,
Everyone knows that shit is crazy.

But really some years have gone,
We're all grown up—beset upon,
Tired and tongue-tied for you Phelia.

Now you're in Amsterdam,
Smoking that thing you know you can,
Everyone wants what you got baby.

Put on the amber light,
We'll see what happens overnight,
I got a hunch that you might save me.

‘Into My Hypercube’,
Let me see what you had to lose,
Everyone wants you got Annalee.

Stucco Skies

I live on a concrete island,
Insulated and tucked away.
Under a stucco sky I've lived all of my days.

And here life is boring,
The sky is green and the grass is gray.
They plastered o'er our dreams and our stories:
My home paper mâché.

The streetlight's buzz a calm forewarning,
Teenage strife arrives too soon.
Fumbling through the door, early morning,
Breaking the golden mean

The sun's linoleum, sky of stucco,
Recycled streets and ambergris.
Phony smiles that stretch for miles,
Sift through this phony screen.

Here we play in a sterilized grave,
The chemlon dawn's as clear as the day.
But stucco skies, and suburban lies,
Will always fade,
Always fade to gray.


All of them were regicides,
Everybody took a side,
One to left and four to right,
He's not going home tonight.

Take this blanket under head,
Skip the prayer for the dead,
No one “Dreams in Infrared,"
Just lies to keep you in good stead.

And I'm praying for you in my way,
May the sky just peel and fall away.

Tell your children teach them well,
Fair to buy and dear to sell,
Thirty years won't break the spell,
Living in a velvet hell.

Through the ages round the bends,
Cross the streets and brave the fens,
Tell your lies and make amends,
Your enemies are not your friends.

And I'm praying for you in my way,
May the sky just peel and fall away,
I'll be praying for you night and day,
From the turning world you'll turn away.

Someone told me not to fight,
What's his name? Oh yeah, you right,
Seems so quaint that right makes might,
Time for one more regicide.

And I'm praying for you in my way,
May it all just be not for today,
May the metaphor be what you say,
May the sky just peel and fall away.



Lend me your ears once,
A girl I knew once
Went over the edge

Into daydreams, older
Than daydreams, colder
The razors gleam.

She went west the
Way I remember it best,
On a mournful train into the night.

Sharpen your razors,
And call back your favors,
Be afraid of all

Daydreams, cause they bite
Hardest at night
When you’re on call.

Rotting slowly,
You won’t know me,
These tears you owe me
Least of all.

Get this wrong.


Want another nightmare?
Here’s a second serving for you,
But take care of what you find there,
It’s the feeling that will floor you

As you crawl across the wind and
Sing the praises of the angels,
Every time that you begin it’s always
Thunderclouds and Rainsville.

Take care as I forget you not to
Hasten in your going, of the
Futures they would let you still are
Several that are glowing,

Where the moon and stars dissemble but
The sun it also rises, don’t think
Harshly of the one who has become what he despises.


Cross your fingers,
Daydreams linger,
Safety razors, all.

Cancer’s growing,
Never knowing
When we’ll fall.

See the lonely,
One and only,
Never knowing where the years go.

Where the years go.
Where the years go.
There the years go.


Most of the day I spent wasting away with good intentions,
Most of the night I spent drinking right into the day,
Most of the thoughts that run through my head dont rate a mention,
Most of the time there's no rhythm or rhyme to what I say.

I need something for the quiet lives,
‘Cause some don't change with all your paradigms,
I can't tell you what's been left behind,
'Cause I still carry it all with me.

Most of us know that one day we'll go beyond this veil of tears,
I'll be one to lay down my gun and fade away,
Open your arms you'll come to know no harm through all the hail of years,
Then close your eyes and a dawn will rise without a day.

Sometimes the sky is a computer screen,
And the city lights all glow in blue in green,
It's hard to say exactly what I mean to any of you.

I need something for the quiet lives,
‘Cause some don't shift with all your paradigms,
I can't tell you what's been left behind.
Cause I still carry it all...

With me.


Started early, every morning,
A world through bleary eyes.
Tried to learn me something more than simple life.

But 13 years ain't much to build upon.

What to you were simple hallways
Almost made me cry.
I thought my soul was trapped there always, until I died.

13 years weren't much to grow up on.
And 13 years were all I had to get it wrong.

Who are all these other people,
Where do they come from?
Maybe they can see inside me,
Where I'm so undone?

13 years aren't much to build upon.
13 years: no holds for holding on...

Help me you unfinished people,
What I know I'll tell:
Someday when I'm old and feeble I'll be well.

13 years aren't much to build upon.
13 years you always get it wrong.
13 years I had so much to say.
13 years have gone and gone away.

So don't call me...(daughter?)

Ledger Lines

Write down numbers, put them in rows:
Trying to get it all together, you know.

Ledger Lines show me where I stand.
Close enough to where I planned.

It seems to me that what we know
Won’t ever take us where we want to go.
So I’ll just sit here and watch the streetlights glow.

Long division helps me be free
Years from now I can’t even see.

File your life in Ledger lines.
Don’t forget to count the time.

Seems to me that where we’ve been:
All over and in between.
Still I don’t understand anything I’ve seen.

Dropped out early, couldn’t find time.
Too many numbers, too many ledger lines.

I’m an island, you are the sea.
No more questions leave me be.

It seems to me that who we were is
Wrapped in memories of her.
Don’t remember, leave it all a blur.